People Jokes That Are Funny

People Jokes

Just read that 4,153,237 people got married last year, not to cause any trouble but shouldn't that be an even number?

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

There are three kinds of people: Those who can count and those who can't.

Never tell your problems to anyone...20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them...

People are making end of the world jokes. Like there is no tomorrow.

Maybe if we start telling people the brain is an app they will start using it.

People say money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you had enough money, you can have a key made.

If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea ... does that mean that one enjoys it?

Some people say "If you can't beat them, join them". I say "If you can't beat them, beat them", because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise.

According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy.

Remember, everyone seems normal until you get to know them...

Music makes every day better, especially if you turn it up just loud enough to drown out all the people around you.

Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

I would like to thank everybody that stuck by my side for those five long minutes my house didn't have internet.

If you can't remember my name, just say 'donuts'. I'll turn around and look.

Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.

In my spare time I like to read, write, and fall in love with unavailable people.

Stupidity comes in all shapes and sizes. Some of them even look like people.

Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?

See more: Clean jokes for adults